unfinished in 2014

A Draft that never resulted in anything and pictures never posted:

• a couple weeks ago I showed Pete and the kids my muscles :) Not very impressive.
• I wore a pony tail for the first time in months (because the shaved part was too short), but was having one of those days and thought the headaches would begin before lunch (because of the pony tail)...but I didn't have one all day. Yay!

Teri read that I wish I had a t-shirt to explain it all so people wouldn't stress about asking...so she sent me one.

BYU football game 2013. Yeah, it was cold.

BBGun target practice 2013 at Grandpa Nettesheim's. I was a good shot BTW.

Love the handicap parking.

In Nov. 2013 we went to WI for Pete's Grandma's birthday and we did some family history.

Just cause you deserve it. 

1 Year!!!! That is a good thing...right!?!'

Where to begin...The first of April was depressing. It was difficult to do anything above the "had to" list. On April 5th & 6th we had General Conference (2 days of apostles and the prophets giving talks, broadcast on TV here, that motivated, uplifted, refocused and everything good.) I especially thought Elder Uchtdorf was speaking to me when he said that gratitude was the catalyst to every Christ like virtue. I wanted to give back but I am not ready in ways that I normally do like babysitting, dinners, room mom, PTA, etc. So I felt like I could work at being grateful. I had been happy at Conference to have my family around me and no schedule, just good thoughts. And after a week of depression I was looking for the cloud to clear but it kept coming back.

On Tuesday April 8th it would be one year since surgery. My kids had spring break that week and it seemed it would be a great day. I had a appointment at the salon, horse therapy, and the kids were mostly packed to go to St. George the next day. But it ended up being the worst of bad days. I won't go into detail but looking back I think a main contributor was the pressure of what we were going to do to celebrate a year. Although I had planned laser tag, bowling and dinner with the family by 3pm I was in bed crying with no desire to go out. Pete was very good to let me blame him and not say anything but just love me and then after I had let it out, he let me sleep.  I woke up and the family was around the fire pit eating s'mores. I hadn't planned to join them but how could I not. It was pure happiness.

We were going south on Thur morning but nothing was holding us back wed afternoon so we told the kids if the car was packed we would get a movie and watch it at home. Halfway up the street to "get the movie" Pete said, "Should we just go to St. George?" After much disbelief the kids were hooping and hollering at that last minute decision.

The sun, and pool, and parks, and eating out were great timing. Pete and I loved it! I think the kids did, too. Pete hadn't had a true vacation in more than a year so it was well appreciated. On Fri we went to a park with the cousins where PJ hit baseballs, the kids played on the slides, Sydney and Lily explored and......I RAN!!! No lie!!! Some of us were kicking the soccer ball around and I was feeling pretty good at my progress when the ball went astray so I ran after it. I was so excited so I ran several times. Pete coached me watching me and telling me things like bend your ankle more and bring your leg up instead of around. It may have been 400 meters total but I ran. I was so excited that I wanted to celebrate but I didn't know how. Pete's brothers spent a couple minutes looking at different options on their phone and knowing I love donuts we decided on "Fractured Prune." It is a real place.   They make your cake donut and glaze it with toppings to order. It was a great place to celebrate.

I played some soccer with the family (kids, cousins, Aunts, Uncles) and was a pillar that people had to go around, but I moved. I don't think I should brag about stopping a 6year old's goal, but there it is. As wrong as it is I am proud of that.

Spring Break is over and it has been a challenge for all of us to accept real life. But we are back. Pete gave the kids a talk saying only 6 more weeks at school so work hard and then it is summer. For me, too.

Facial, Vestibular and Hippo Therapy Part I

There are two things I am not good at: typing and multitasking. Both of these make it less than ideal for blogging.

PART I

I am going to Facial and Vestibular Therapy again Tue Jan 21.  I went in Dec. and Janine measured my face a lot, took pictures and looked to see where I was at.  at one point I wore a new gadget she had as well. Ski goggles that also had a cover for the lens. The cool thing was that the lens was actually a camera that recorded my eyes. We did several tests without and with the cover and I was able to watch the computer after and see my reaction. She gave me several facial exercises as well as treadmill work and I enjoyed the therapist as a person.

She also gave me a copy of an article written by her mentor that explained the rehab for the face.
And a copy of an article written by an AN patient. The story and pictures of the patient were very familiar.

The fact that Dunkin Donuts is only a couple blocks away didn't hurt my mood. ;)

I also started a weekly hippo (horse) therapy. My mom found it and we visited to get the 4-1-1. (does that date me?) I asked Dr. Shelton about it and he asked what the benefits were and I was less than clear or helpful because I didn't know. He then asked if I like riding?
"I love it."
"Then do it - but don't spend a lot of money" he said with a smile.

My facial therapist said she loved Hippo therapy (she knew all about it) and thought it would be wonderful for me. So I tried it.  

The first day I talked with the Hippo Therapist there and told her my goals: to be a normal mom, not being tired all the time, strength to carry my babies up the stairs when they fall asleep, and anything else the horses could provide. She gave me a couple things to work on unrelated to the horse that I hadn't heard. (Standing on my right leg only, like a pelican, at set times, like the grocery line or commercials on a show, and sashaying several feet then changing the lead foot.) She asked about my horse history- western on Arabians-  so she ordered a white Arabian in his 20's named TJ. The horse had a person on the left as well as the right and someone to lead. Having all of them there felt weird. When I climbed on the horse from a ramp I couldn't believe my fear. What used to be natural was not easy. The horse walked and my "seat" was not even. I felt like I was going to fall off for 10 minutes at least. Now I could see why there were so many people and was glad to have them there. I had little more than a blanket for a saddle and tried to get even so I wouldn't fall. I would think I had it until the horse started walking again and I would start to fall again. I used my legs to hold on instead of letting them hang. I realized that equal does not feel the same on both sides. What felt like equal was actually pulling left quite a bit. I learned what was equal even though it didn't feel "right" and was able to mimic the feeling walking after, so I immediately starting walking better. I think one could see the difference and I could surely feel it.

I also did a few exercises to help with balance and limber me up. I put my arms out like a plane and slowly turned my torso with my head till I was parallel with the horse. Then I slowly rotated to the other side.  It sounds simple but it took all of my concentration and I was so tight on the right that I was sore. I did a leg lift thing that made me sore, too.  But I loved it.

As I was telling the therapist last week, I love being on the horse but I also like being able to talk about my "challenges." It feels like it is feedback here instead of complaining and it is ok that it is one sided.